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Loving You


Essential Living Blog

Loving You

How many people grew up being taught that putting yourself first is selfish and unnatural? I know there are people out there that are genuinely selfish and are takers. But I’m not talking about them. That’s a topic for next time. I am talking about those of us who unselfishly put others first all the time. I know that especially happens with African American women. Well, maybe that’s because I’m black, and I see and feel my sisters' pain.

I have seen far too many of us sacrifice our dreams, bodies, and souls for the sake of someone else or for a sacred cause. We give and give until it hurts. We deplete our reserves to the point of no return. We have nothing left for ourselves. This is a tragedy.

How good are you to anyone if your soul is sucked out of you? Today, start being a little selfish. Start taking care of yourself. Self-care is not just a cute coined term. It is real. You are no good if you are not good to yourself.

I’ve contemplated this issue for a long time. I am a giver. I am not comfortable unless I am giving and helping. But lately, I have been giving to the point that it has literally depleted my soul. And believe me, there are people out there that will suck the living and giving out of you, who will allow you to keep on giving even if they see that giving to them is literally killing you. When you get to that state, it is unhealthy. You must save yourself. You must heal yourself. You must put yourself first.

It is ok to put yourself first. It is ok to put your well-being first. You were not put on this earth to give everything you got to a person or a cause and get nothing in return. If you are going to be of some good in this world, you need to be healthy in mind, body, and spirit. Give yourself permission to live for you.

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